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4 Funny Student Excuses from a Kindergarten Classroom

Student Excuses

Whether it's avoiding something they don't want to do or attempting to cover a mistake, student excuses run the gamut. As a kindergarten teacher, you'd think I'd be spared a ride on the excuse caboose. But in reality, kids really do say the darndest things.

Here are some of the funniest one-liners I've heard from my students.

 

It's Called Homework

As I was checking my students' homework folders on Friday, I noticed that it was the second week in a row that Bobby had not turned in his homework. I called him over to my desk, and as he walked over, it looked like he had 10-pound weights in his shoes. "Hey Bobby, what's going on?" I asked. "Is there any reason why you didn't complete your homework this week?" Bobby hesitated, looked around the room, and started digging his hands into his pockets. "Well, Mr. Boender, it is called 'homework' for a reason, right? So I figured I didn't need to bring it to school; it's not schoolwork," he said.

An Important Distinction

It was a warm, sunny day in May. During recess, students were playing tag, swinging on the swings, and generally enjoying the playground. A number of aides and teachers were monitoring the kids when they noticed a student hysterically crying by the swings. Teachers ran over to the upset child to assess the problem. After calming him down, an aide asked the child what had happened. "He hit me!" the boy said, pointing to a student standing right next to him. "I did not hit him," he responded. "I punched him."

A Reasonable Excuse

One day, I was checking weekly homework and confronted a student who didn't have any papers in her homework folder. Her response was not what I expected: "My brain stops working after I leave school!" I couldn't really blame her: Kindergarten is much more rigorous than when I was in school.

Someone Needs a Breather

Learning can be so exhausting—at least that's what one of my students thought as I passed out an addition fact fluency practice page. I walked over to my yellow table and noticed that Lauren was sprawled out on the table like a walrus bathing in the hot sun. "What's the matter, Lauren?" I asked. "I just can't do it anymore! My brain is out of oxygen!" she responded. Boy, have I been there!

No matter how funny, witty, or ridiculous student excuses may be, it's important to teach students the importance of being responsible, caring, and productive citizens. So while they get points for creativity, they should still turn in their homework!

   
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